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  • Sleep: Stop Counting The Hours

    It is an odd statement to say but sleep has become a real trend of late. It seems everyone is attached to a device that tells them exactly how much they are getting. 2017 saw the birth of clean-sleeping‚ along with a plethora of technology to ensure you get those precious eight hours, but by creating such rigid rules for sleep making you worse?

    Sleep

     

    Putting a number on how many hours of sleep we should get isn’t realistic, she says. When we talk about, good‚ and bad‚ sleep we create fear about something that is as personal to us as a fingerprint. This constant concern about not getting enough sleep can cause you to actually lose sleep.

    Dr Petra Simic, Clinical Director of Bupa Health Clinics

     

    So, if we are not sleeping well naturally and the gadgets are not helping, what are we to do? The answer lies in your habits and ignoring any trend.

     

    • Binge-sleeping

    A full night’s sleep every night is, of course, the goal but, for most, this is unrealistic. When you get the opportunity to for a good long sleep, take it. Recharge those batteries with an early night or a long lay-in at the weekend/holidays. Regular sleep binges will help your body to repair, so never feel guilty for those extra hours.

     

    • Anti-track Yourself

    Today we count everything from calories to steps, and overall, this is beneficial but putting a number on sleep can increase anxiety about not getting enough. If you struggle to nod off, or find that you wake up during the night, whatever you do, do not check the time. By checking the time your brain automatically calculates how long you have left until you need to get up and determines how tired you will be that day.

     

    • You Are Not Everyone

    Resist the urge to compare your sleep with others. Everyone requires different amounts and at different intervals. You sleep what your body requires and ignore what everyone else does.

     

    • Don’t Race To Bed

    Come the evening we naturally start to relax and feel sleepy. We suddenly realise that it is time for bed and rush to complete our routine before we get into bed. Stop! This habit is filling your body with adrenaline which makes it harder to drop off to sleep. Prepare before you sit down to relax. Do the dishes, the morning prep and put on your PJs first, then, when you become sleepy you can simply go straight to bed.

     

    • Holistic Help

    If you struggle with sleep, or even if you just want to discover a better way to relax, contact your local alternative health centre. They can help with massage, relaxation, breathing, meditation and positive thinking.

     

    • Naps

    They may be hard to work around work but short naps of 20-30 minutes especially in the early afternoon have been proven to increase performance. Naps do not work for everyone and for some, can increase sleepiness or leave them awake late into the night. Remember that naps are not a replacement for night sleeping.

     

    Sleep

     

  • My Autistic Son Locks himself In His Room At Christmas

    For most children celebrating Christmas, it is an exciting time of year, but for those with Autism and their families, it can be an extraordinarily challenging time of year.

    The simple joys such as opening presents and sitting down to the turkey roast can become flashpoints for those who place huge importance on their routines.

    So, how do families with Autistic children make it through this period?

     

     

    For Dave and his 9-year-old son Daniel, it is a cautious time of year that must be handled delicately.

    “All the adverts come out and people start visiting, he cannot understand nor make sense of it. The house looks different, cards and decorations everywhere, and he defiantly acts differently to his usual character. He likes to lock himself in the sanctuary of his bedroom, a place where nothing changes. On the big day, we have learned not to overwhelm him with gifts.”

     

    Previously the family tried to get Daniel to sit down and open all his presents, but he did not cope with the pressure and became very upset. In the end, it took him a week to open his presents. The family is unsure that Daniel comprehends Santa Claus as he finds the character frightening, or that he even understands what Christmas is.

    The family says it is difficult for their son to explain what he would like for the big day, leaving them feeling guilty as their other children get what they ask for.

     

    Christmas dinner is a challenge for Daniel too as he fears consuming solid food after having acid reflux as a baby.

     

    “This year he might eat something pureed down or chopped very fine.”

     

    The family told us that people often say how sorry they are/feel that our son has a disability, and how hard it must be for us.

     

    “Yes, it is a challenge at times but as he grows and develops, we learn what works best for him and our family. We do not want nor need pity and words of apologies. Daniel is our boy, he is not special because he has Autism, he is special just like his sisters because he is our child.”

     

    If you would like more information do contact us.

  • Single Parent Stress Quiz

    Are You A Stressed Single Parent?

     

    Single Parent Stress

    Would you like free support?

    The Devon Clinic is looking for single parents in Torbay to participate in a short survey.

    The results will enable us to apply for funding. this means that we will once again be in a position to help and support single parents coping with stress and anxiety.

    Click To Take Our Quiz

     

    Tea

     

  • Always on Culture, causing stress epidemic

    A recent survey has found that more British adults are suffering from stress than ever before. Work pressure, financial worries and health concerns all contribute to rising levels of stress.

     

    The survey carried out by Axa of 4,000 individuals reported that four out of five adults surveyed felt stressed during a typical working week. Out of those, one in ten reported being stressed all the time.

     

    The workplace stress was linked to the always-on culture where people were taking calls and checking emails outside of work hours. Two-thirds were worried about their salary prospects and being able to pay household bills if they didn’t continue to work in the evenings and during the weekends.

     

    Men were more likely to be stressed at work than women the survey found. Many said they indulge in negative habits to combat stress. Alcohol, energy drinks, overeating, and smoking were top of the list. Exercising came at top of the list of positive things men did to control stress which is encouraging.

     

    As you’d expect, those working in large co-operations in large cities came higher on the stress scale than those working in small towns or those within a smaller company.

     

    It is important to differentiate work from home for the sake of your health and the health of those around you. We all need some stress in our lives but is it when this stress becomes all-consuming you need to step back and access where things need to be adjusted.

  • Stress-Free Christmas

     

    Christmas and the summer holidays are the most stressful times of the year for many parents. The Christmas holiday period is a mass of social interactions and buying everything to create the perfect day. It is no wonder us parents are stressed to the hills! We buy gifts for their school teachers, club leaders and mountains of cards for their friends, and that even before we get close to the big day. I dread the annual trudge through town and all those last-minute panics trying to get my hands on that must-have but sold out toy. This year, I can come up with a plan to make this all manageable.

     

     

     

     

    Plan Ahead

    Make a list of things you need to do early; food shopping, gifts, decorations, posts, seating arrangements and invites. Prioritise the items on your list; can they be done now and most importantly, are they essential?

     

    Don’t forget to delegate tasks to family and friends especially if they will be with you over the Christmas period.

     

    Shop Online

    Now, I am not saying do not shop locally, I am saying that with the larger chain stores you can save time by ordering online and having your items delivered/collect in store.

     

    Christmas Cards

     

    If you haven’t already, start now! Write a few each day and keep them in a pile for when you are ready to post and distribute them.

     

    Know When to Stop

    Pick a date when you will stop preparations and start to actually enjoy the holiday. Use your plan to make this achievable.

     

    Christmas Day and Beyond

    Keep Calm!

    Play some relaxing music, take time out to gather your thoughts or do some mindfulness. At the end of the day maybe light a nice candle and take a relaxing bath.

    Avoid caffeinated drinks as this will raise your cortisol levels- fight or flight.

     

    Have an Escape Plan

    It is a good idea to have some pre-planned excuses to escape to when things become a little too stressful. Use your imagination; say you need to phone a friend or check on a neighbour, anything to give you those precious ten minutes of silent calm.

     

    Avoid Drinking Too Much

    Most articles will tell you to avoid alcohol but let’s face it, it’s Christmas! Enjoy a few spaced-out drinks just don’t go overboard.

     

    Finally, and most importantly, HAVE FUN!

    Remember it is your Christmas too so try and relax enough to enjoy it. If things do not turn out exactly as you had planned, don’t worry, I bet no one noticed.

     

  • Vital signs That You Are Addicted To Social Media

    A new survey has shown that Instagram is the worst ranking social medic platform in terms of impact on the mental health of young people.

    1,479 young people (aged 14-24) surveyed, showed Instagram was positive in terms of self-expression but hugely negative in how they saw their body image, sleep, and fear of missing out. In addition, many said they felt panic-stricken and physically sick if they do not post regular images of themselves on social media.

    Shockingly, Facebook addiction can now be picked up on brain scans of those who cannot stay off the platform, affecting grey matter in similar ways to cocaine.

    Here are twelve sings that you too could be addicted to social media platforms;

    1. When you eat out by the time the drinks arrive you already have your phone out. You have photographed and applied a hashtag to each course and between courses are taking selfies.

    2. The first thing you do upon waking is reach for your phone which is always within arms reach or even in your bed. You instantly check for messages and check how many likes or shares your witty comment/photo from last night got.

    3. You get caught trying to update social media whilst helping your children with their homework.

    4. You greet your friends at a social gathering by tweeting them instead of approaching them in person.

    5. You take your phone to the toilet, so you can check on a photo you posted or were tagged in.

    6. Someone asks you on Monday morning how your weekend was, and you instantly become offended that they do not know because you did splash it across all the platforms.

    7. You like, favourite and pin your own posts and photos on your accounts.

    8. You are constantly checking in everywhere you go even if it is at the doctors, supermarket, cafe or bus stop.

    9. Upon hearing the sad news that someone famous has died you jump straight online to check it out and learn all that you can about their career in order not to feel left out of online conversations. You even #RIP even if you have no idea who they were.

    10. If someone tells you a joke you instantly say lol‚ instead of physically laughing.

    11. You get yourself into a panic when watching a popular television show because you want to be the first on the timeline to say something humorous.

    12. The phrase “hashtag” has become an everyday part of your vocabulary.

    If you or someone you know has an addiction to social media we can help, contact us below.

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  • Stress Busting Tips For A Stress-Free Christmas

     

     

    Many find Christmas a stressful time of year and it is mainly due to expectations. We all frantically worry about purchasing the right gift, preparing the perfect spread, and decorating the house in time for one that one specific day of the year.

    Here are my top stress-busting tips to help you have fun and to avoid being frazzled.

     

     

    1. State your expectations

    Have conversations with your guests in advance regarding their expectations and reach a compromise.

    If cost is a worry, set limits for gifts, and ask guests to bring a platter or bottle with them.

     

    1. Remember it is okay to say no

    During your conversations with family about expectations, discuss what you want to do. It is okay to turn something down like cooking the meal. Try to have alternative suggestions such as everyone pitching in or bringing a tray of something.

     

    1. Practical preparations

    If you are hosting on the day, it is a good idea to get the preparation out of the way-simple things like prepping the meal and wrapping presents in advance. During the run-up to Christmas have a list of tasks that need completing and share them amongst your friends and family.

     

    1. Delegation

    Do not be afraid to ask your guests for help. There is no need to fall into the trap of trying to be the perfect host if anything it’s exhausting! Get everyone to pitch in, children especially like to feel helpful.

     

    1. Avoid Conflict

    If you are worried your guests might not get on, break the day up and go for a walk. This will give everyone the chance to chat or even to stay home if tension builds. Alternatively, you can ask guests to make drinks, prepare snacks or help you tidy up.

     

    1. Remember, it is your Christmas too

    Christmas day can whiz by in a blur because you have been frantically chasing around after others. Remember, it is your Christmas too and you should enjoy it. Make time for yourself during the day so that you can enjoy it too.

     

    If you are finding the pressure of the season too much you can contact us, we can help.

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  • Anxiety makes it difficult to make and keep friends

    It can be hard to make friends but throw in anxiety and it is like trying to put a cork back into a wine bottle; it is a bad fit.

    I’ve had social anxiety for five years now and in that time, I have spent most of it avoiding the people around me.

    Last year I moved to a new area and I have been trying to make new friends because as reluctant as I am, I know I should socialise. Being thirty, approaching someone at a gathering is like handing them a business card. It’s time-consuming, you get odd looks and you feel awkwardly uncomfortable. I have found it near impossible to build a group of new friends.

     

    Is it me? Am I a bad friend? Am I doing this all wrong? All these questions roam my mind until any effort is futile.

    The thing is, my anxiety makes me a difficult person to get along with. When I am having a good day, I will message everyone on my phone arranging meet-ups but when things inevitably turn sour, there I am cancelling everything last minute for no reason aside from my unpredictable mood.

    The minutest of things can create the never-ending list of possible disasters should I socialise. Perhaps I won’t like my drink, perhaps I will spill it, it might be expensive, they might want to share a platter and split the bill, I might get lost or take too long in the bathroom, but the worst is my perpetuating fear that I will have a panic attack in public. It can be pretty much anything my brain can think of and circulate in my head like a sprawling migraine until I relent and cancel.

    Of course, we shouldn’t shy away from the ugly side of mental illness and I do have some coping mechanisms that can help me get out and about, but I cannot help but think even these are adding to the problem.

    I dictate where we go because I need to see the menu beforehand, plan my route to the counter, toilets and fire exits. I cannot handle spur of the moment decisions, so pub crawls and shopping trips are out of the question. I can’t drink because although it puts my anxiety at ease it heightens depression. Being the only sober one at a gathering means my patience wears thin, especially when everyone reaches that merry stage. When I hit my daily limit of pretending to be friendly, I simply get up and leave. Halfway through a conversation, a drink or a meal? I don’t care. Once my limit is reached I am out of there. The problem with that is, aside from the obvious rudeness, I forget that I am not the only one with mental health problems. I forget that my actions may negatively impact those I am with but at that moment in time I simply cannot see it.

    So, you see, it is no wonder making friends that stick around is hard. Finding friends who will willingly stand by me during my bad days is even harder. I know I let people down at the last minute and I see why they are reluctant to make plans with a person who may drop them with less than an hour’s notice, but bear with me, I am trying.

    Until the time comes when my anxiety doesn’t rule my every action, please approach with caution.

  • Looking after your mental health whilst on holiday

        It can feel a little silly to admit that going on holiday can leave you feeling wrecked. Mental health issues can pop up wherever you are. It shouldn’t come as a surprise that issues can arise whilst on holiday or that being away from home can make them worse. The disruption to routine, the jetlag, alcohol, and pressure to have fun can all add worry. The trick is, to be honest with yourself and making sure you keep up essential self-care.

     

    Preparation is the key

    medication
    1. Keep taking your medication.

    It may sound strange but the temptation to skip it for a week is high when on holiday. Set an alarm to remind you and ensure you have enough for the entire duration.

    relax
    1. Give yourself permission to stay in the hotel

    Remember you are somewhere new. The agenda can be amended if you need to spend the day or evening relaxing in your room. It is better to spend the time when you need it than push through and waste the rest of the week miserable and exhausted. After all, the entire idea of going was to feel relaxed and refreshed.

    sleep
    1. Get plenty of sleep

    Make the most of that big comfy bed and get some good sleep in. Tiredness is a major contributor to poor mental health and this doesn’t change just because you are on holiday. Give yourself a bedtime and allow yourself naps especially if you feel

    tea
    1. Take home comforts

    Pack a few home comforts for when you are away. Perhaps your favourite tea, your cosy pyjamas, or a blanket. Familiar comfort items will help you feel less on edge.

    therapy
    1. Decide arrangements for missed therapy

    If time away means you miss a therapy session put steps in place. Perhaps have an extra session before you go or Skype during your trip. If these aren’t possible, use the time you would normally have a session to write down your thoughts and feelings, perhaps to a CBT worksheet.

    time alone
    1. Have time alone

    It can be tough be ensuring you have sufficient alone time whilst on holiday will help you relax. Do not feel pressured into meeting up or going out. It might be an idea to inform fellow travelers of your plans for time alone prior to the trip.

    travel
    1. How much planning works for you?

    For some, a regimented plan for the holiday works in their favour but for you, this might be your worst nightmare. If planning stresses you out try making a shortlist of things you’d like to do whilst there and tick them off as you go-it doesn’t matter if you do not complete it, there is always next time.

    money

        8.Give yourself a generous budget

    Once there one of the top things that stresses people out is their budget. Ensure you have a realistic budget and take a little extra increase you want to purchase something you see or take a different excursion-you can always take home what you do not spend.

    rushing
    1. Give up caring when things become a chore

    Rushing from place to place because of your schedule can make your holiday a miserable experience. Enjoy the moment you are in, it is your holiday after all. If you are happy and relaxed at the end, it doesn’t matter what you did.

    If you would like more support and information please contact us