The Devon Clinic

Tag: control anger

  • Depression and the real kicker

    Depression and the real kicker

    As a clinical psychologist, I often meet people with depressive symptoms, low mood or diagnosed depression.

     

    I also meet people who, through medication or time, have beaten depression.

    Still, the one thing these two groups can often have in common is GUILT.

    Often guilty thoughts/feelings/beliefs are formed in depression and are about issues with some truth. For example, a depressed parent may feel guilt about their effect upon their children.

    The guilt is considered logical‚(What parent doesn’t feel some anxiety about their parenting?)

    But the depression makes the blame 100% terrible.
    As a result, in many of these people, the low mood is bad, but the guilt is worse.

    Once the mood lifts, through medication or time, the guilt remains.

    Guilt is a belief made of words or experience and remains unchallenged.
    It does not respond to medication, and it can withstand time.
    What To Do.

    Know it for what it is

    Unrealistic/overblown guilt formed in depression.

    Consider if you have developed a style of thinking that encourages guilt.
    Remember, just because I think it, it doesn’t mean it’s true.

    Challenge it.

    • Are my thoughts factual, or are they just my interpretations?
    • Am I jumping to negative conclusions?
    • How can I find out if my thoughts are actually true?
    • Is this situation as bad as I am making it out to be?
    • Would other people/(someone in particular) think the same way?
    • Will this matter in five days/weeks/months/years?
    • What can I do that will help me solve the problem?
    • Cognitive therapies are very helpful in dealing with guilt and can often provide long-term skills & benefits very quickly.

    On a broader note, other holistic therapies, such as massage, can produce a sense of well-being, pleasure and calm, which is often missing when feeling low.

    For more information or to contact Dr Kalmus by telephoning The Devon Clinic on 01803 500300

    Dr Ellis Kalmus BA(Hons) ClinPsyD, CPsychol, AFBPsS
    Clinical Psychologist

  • How to control anger effectively

    Anger Management

    Anger is a result of feeling frustrated, insulted, deceived or even under attack. For many, anger is a natural reaction that passes quickly. In some instances, however, it can become a difficult emotion to control. Health issues linked to unresolved anger include high blood pressure, heart attack, depression, anxiety, colds, flu and problems with digestion.

    The general advice given for anger management includes counting to ten and breathing slowly as counting to 10 gives you time to cool down so you can think more clearly and overcome the impulse to lash out while breathing out longer than breathing in, and relax as you breathe out will help calm you down effectively and help you think more clearly. Bring down your general stress levels with exercise and relaxation. Running, walking, swimming, yoga and meditation are just a few of the activities that can help reduce stress. Although these treatments are useful and effective, they are often short-lived.

    Because of this, people who become angry are often in search of ways and treatments to help their case in the long run.

    There are private courses and therapists who can help with anger issues. Make sure any therapist you see is registered with a professional organisation.

    Hypnotherapy has proven to be an effective way to control angry outbursts. The initial aim of the hypnotherapist will be to understand the root cause of your anger will work on a conscious and unconscious level to help change your negative thought processes and hopefully, this will achieve a difference in your reaction to anger triggers. Feeling calmer in stressful situations helps you think more clearly so you can react more appropriately.

    Most anger management involves learning forms of stress management, these techniques will help reduce the triggers that bring about anger in the first place.